On – Going Wounds

You raise your children to be respectable people in life. Make good choices in their lives but the whole time they want to cross over to the bad side of life.  Not respecting themselves, talking back to their parents, lying. having unprotected sex at a young age.  When they get into trouble, they call mom/dad not their friends that they always listen too.
It is amazing how the WOUNDS from your children can make such of an impact and almost dismantle your very life…. I was thinking that 10 years ago, I knew what I wanted to do, who I was supposed to be, where I was supposed to do and where I would be going…NOW – I feel that I have allowed my kids negative and very disrespectful behavior to shift me and disrupt “the old me”….. and emotionally at times I feel that I have nothing to show for it. The seven LONG years of praying, crying etc..carrying their heavy and unwanted burdens etc..etc.
Mentally,,,, emotionally… financially…physically…spiritually they have DRAINED me like a well that only Jesus can produce water from “again” on their behalf. Whew – talk about long suffering! For every three steps that I THINK that we may be moving forward – my kids show me that it was all a fasad / shirade / mirage! Seeing your kids demise is an UGLY experience and even through their disrespectful ways – as a mother / parent….you still do not wish them any harm.
However, surely I do believe in this scripture about honoring your mother and father…. my kids must have thrown out the memo!