Many women feel guilty when they take a break for themselves, but that may be a dangerous thing. If you never have any time except reactive time — things you must do for others — you don’t have a sense of control. You are interrupted all the time.
I have been reading up on symptoms and have seen that your brain can have trouble resting even during sleep. Such chronic exhaustion increases the release of stress hormones, and your blood sugar rises. If this is your normal state, then the physical consequences increase your risk of diabetes, heart disease, and memory problems. If that’s not enough to scare you into taking some time for yourself, consider this: The hormonal effects of always being on edge help deposit fat right around your waist.
Many women believe that taking time for yourself is a selfish thing to do. In fact, the opposite is true: if you are not at your peak, you cannot take care of others. I think new moms AND single mothers are especially prone not to take ME time. They believe ‘the baby’ …..”the kids”…takes precedence over all of their lives, and they must bow to their every whim.
But the thing is, that is exhausting, and if you are exhausted, you cannot be a good mom. I have come to a cease halt because I HAVE BECOME VERY EXHAUSTED and this week, I thought that I would literally just keel over from tiredness!
On an airplane, parents are taught to put the mask on themselves first then to place the mask on their kids. This is because if they have trouble getting the mask on their children, both the parent and the child could die because neither got their mask on properly.
I believe this applies to life as well: you have to take care of yourself first!!! I may be VERY LATE just now discovering to put ME FIRST but it is better late than never!
Taking time for yourself needs to be just that: a few hours where you are not interrupted or wondering when the children are going to need something next. It needs to be something you do completely for yourself. Going grocery shopping away from the kids does not count…’me time’ must be something you like to do and you do only for yourself.
Think about taking a class you’ve always wanted to take, or taking time out to read a book you’ve always wanted to read, or even just sleeping in.
Turn off the cell phone, and inform everyone that you are not to be disturbed, and then follow through with that: do not allow anyone to disturb you. The best way to do this is to get away from the kids and husband and go somewhere else.
My son now is used to going away to camp at least a few times a year.
How about Don’t take the kids with you, just go somewhere and unwind!! But do it WITH NO KIDS!! I have taken it a step further to send my son to camp for 4 weeks over the summer. One week in June, two weeks in July and one week in August. They are all split apart of course so we can still bond and have our time BUT I have made a very conscious decision to put me first going forward!
I want to LIVE! but live well..be happy..be healthy & remain whole!