Random Relationship Thought – “s”


Relationships are often stressful and require a lot of effort to make them  successful. Friendships can sometimes become toxic and unhealthy to one or both  people involved. Letting go of unpleasant or unhealthy friendships can be very  difficult but is a vital step to improving overall quality of life, reduce  stress and possibly improve self-esteem. Once a friendship becomes more effort than  what it’s worth, letting that friend go is better done sooner than  later.

Focus on yourself, improve yourself and work towards a better version of who you are at the moment. The only person that you should change is you. If you live with someone who is difficult, or even if you just spend some time with them, take each time you interact with them as a new experience.

One of the most powerful things you can do is simply change how you view that difficult person. Maybe after you put yourself in their shoes, or learn that you are also a bit like them, you might find that they are not that difficult after all. Don’t let your first impressions be the only ones you have. And don’t waste your time trying to change anyone, instead, use that time and energy to improve who you are.

In the end we all just WANT PEACE right?? I personally have wasted too much time over the years of maintaining relationships that were DEAD for a long time….. Thank goodness for God’s revelation right!

I pray that you be still long enough to realize that SPRING CLEANING does not have to happen in the SPRING!! For me, it is a weekly thing and I feel lighter and lighter and it is an overwhelming POSITIVE EXPERIENCE in my life…. try it for yourself and see!

However, these things will ONLY work if you want to restore the relationships………. ALSO understand that in all honesty, all relationships are NOT meant to be restored…… In the end, it is about self love – and what YOU KNOW what is best for you…..

# until next time…..


No Black Eyes Today!


Umm…we are smiling but trust me – ask us if we are super sleepy….. Our sons are both in 9 MILLION activities….

She is soo amazing and I love that I have friends with various backgrounds / cultures / nationalities etc.. It makes me better and broadens my horizons with my son too. My son being exposed to things that are “un -American” is a plus…. Everyday, I am finding ways for us BOTH to live outside of the box as well as INVENT our own boxes!

I smile because of him….Even when im having a bad day, He makes me smile and i am soo proud to call him my son! My (love muffin) oops… I meant to say that MY son had two basketball games today – I guess they are called double headers…oh no wait – that is in BASEBALL right?


LOL Well anyway, he did soooooooooooooooo well it was SICK! He made a few 3 pointers, looked over at me then got a tad bit cocky!


You saw his photo that I uploaded yesterday looking like he had been punched in the face….. well each time that he made a lay up, scored a few points and started running……I realized that The only thing that I said to him was great job baby and watch your face! LOL


Poor Jared-

Well I did try!!! I FORGOT to pick up his best friend to go to the movies and to eat with us because I GOT ANOTHER BUSINESS CALL…. I feel like that I lost the mother of the year award from my own son!!! UGGGHHHHH

I figured if I kept cracking jokes that it would get him to cheer up – he is sooooo sooo not happy right now! He rather stare VERY HARD at the television in our eatery than talk to his poor mom!

I offered this boy a MAKE UP play date with his best friend and he never even FLINCHED an eye brow….let alone an eyeballl!!! I even asked him to take photos with me to try and get him to at least CRACK a smile….. NOPE #tryagainmom

I just asked him why cant I get a break and he said… MOM YOU ARE ALWAYS BUSY! I too advised him that I AM ALWAYS available for him and we are together at least 85% of the time – My son even loves politics now – ( really since he was about 6 ) because I take him to ALL OF THE CAMPAIGNS that I work on. So he could see what I do…… what I LOVE and to get him involved in understanding WHY POLITICS IS, HOW IT WORKS AND WHY IT IS IMPORTANT. He is 10 years old and by the age of 7, he already picked his political party!! The ex president that I am obsessed with – he reminds me daily that he lives in another state and he is also no longer the president! LOL ( WHO CARES! )

I did NOT want to disregard what he said just in case he REALLY felt that I was too busy and not spending enoug QUALITY time with him and he said he just said that because he was mad and all the cell phones kept ringing – he had a VERY VALID POINT via the cell phones….so I cut them all off.

My son then said – Mom that show that you like called Scandal because its about Politics – I said yeah ( all smiling ) He said, you are that lady Olivia Poe she is always busy and her friends are the people she works with! I said OUCH!!! I said well my friends are in the church and political arena and what is wrong with that? He said nothing but that lady is too busy to get married!!!! I SAID OUCH AGAIN!!! LOL I told him that “getting married” SURELY IS THE EASY PART – but being with the RIGHT MATE is something that surely takes time. I KINDLY reminded him and said to him in a serious but sweet voice……………..

That my future husband has to be A PERFECT FIT FOR ME AND YOU BUDDY! and there is alot into being Godly connected! He laughed and said..Oh yeah, you are right mommy because I wouldnt want you to get killed or anything! I said huh??? He said I remember watching that Drew Peterson story and we can just wait until God sends us the right person, so I dont mind us both being busy all the time!!


I had a HAPPY LITTLE YOUNG MAN sitting beside me and we are BOTH now two happy campers!! He’s my Inspiration….

I have a little treat for my baby when we are done hanging out…. Im gonna go hang out with my mom and sister and he can have fun with another friend of his that lives closer to the house – he will be happy…. What parents do for their kids happiness! LOL


Quality Friendships

These are the qualities that each one of us needs if our friendships are going to last. Charity, Humility, Reverence, Inspiration, Sacrifice and Toleration — these enable the real friends to be sifted from the false. If you take the first letter of each one of these qualities and arrange them in order they will form one word:

 C from Charity  H from humility  R from reverence  I from intelligence  S from sacrifice   T from toleration

spell and form the word Christ. In bringing these qualities into your own life you put on Christ. And when you become so Christ-like, then you have the warmth and affection that will cause you to lay down your life for a friend and it will inspire your friends to be willing to lay down their lives for you.

For a friendship to survive each must try to learn and understand the workings of the minds of others. Friendships are not proven by the sounding of words, of the moving of lips. It is achieved through the workings of one’s mind trying to procure the best thoughts, the best motives, the best ideals, for the one whom he wishes to call his friends. This intelligent appreciation of each others mind, produces a greatness that is above jealousies and pettiness. It accounts for the peace and happiness that true friends experience when in each others company.

Sacrifice is always a must in any quality relationship. This simply means giving yourself to others till it hurts and forgiving those who have trespassed against you. A complete emptying of your own personality so that it adds luster to the one who receives it. Sacrifice is the true test of friendship. Only when it is in use can the friendship hope to survive. Christ said, “Greater love than this no one has than he who lays down his life for a friend.”

Tolerating their faults, suffering with their failures. Toleration brings with it a unity of spirit, develops a marriage between hearts and strengthens each one in the desire to be virtuous. Without toleration no friendship can be cultivated. No friendship can ever hope to survive. Because of what you must give to a friend and what he must give to you, it is impossible to have many friends in your life.



I dont need a lot of them – God knows that I dont!  How about just maybe maybe one or two who is able to be there for ME!  Nonetheless, overall I feel that  a friend gives THEMSELF as a gift……  in word as well as in deed.

Everyone desires / wants/ expects / needs a variety of things from their friendships. However, some things are foundational and should be considered “basic” things.

Respect Others

Respect, R-E-S-P-E-C-T as Aretha Franklin sang it, is a critical component of freedom. It’s the partner of freedom in that respecting another person’s competence and individuality provides the positive support so important to freedom.

A contrast makes this point: suppose someone grants you the freedom to follow your dream with an underlying current of disrespect. It might sound something like, “Go ahead if you must, I’ll be right here after you’ve chased that dream.” In other words, the person thinks you’ll fail and you’ll come crawling back.

The same scenario with respect might sound like, “Go ahead, I know how important this is to you and I support you 100%. I know you can do it!” Obviously, we’d all like to hear this latter response because of the inherent respect and support it conveys.

Support Those You Care About

Support is an important factor in any relationship. As we stretch ourselves, as we encounter rough spots and obstacles, a supportive relationship gives us strength and reassurance. Support rejuvenates and re-energizes. Aren’t we all attracted to people who are supportive of us?

Treat Everyone as an Equal

Equality is the enabler that says we’re both equal partners in this marriage, partnership, or friendship. A parent-child relationship is fine for teens and below, but among partners, friends, and adult children and their parents, without the underlying recognition of equality, respect is limited, support is more controlling than supportive, and commitment is probably more toward control than growth.

These are a few things that I give in a friendship… waiting for God to bless me with genuine friends as well. Just because I know a great deal of people / network with a great deal of people / minister with a great deal of people …. DOES NOT mean that those same individuals have made it into my CIRCLE OF FRIENDS!

Family, Inspiration

Sister – Power!

 Today my sister got a new car and the whole process was a God send!! The whole process was smooth! The whole process was easy! The whole process was fun! The whole process was comfortable! The whole process was needed! The whole process was felt!  The whole process was favor! The whole process was spirit – led! The whole process was God! Can you imagine going to the car dealership already knowing what you want and when you get there, they give you what you want and work out the numbers in 10 minutes flat and get you out the door? Welp that is indeed what had transpired today with my big sister!! She is soo amazing and getting the car that >>>she wanted <<<< was so well deserved on her end. I think that I am as sweet as pie and as nice as a sponge cake! Then, I take a moment and think of my sister and I cant even compare to her! Well, I am next to the baby…so shouldnt it be that way anyway? LOL

 The God apointed  sales woman named Ms Lisa was like an angel behind a desk for real. There was no pushing, no prying, no fast talking and the whole transaction flowed so fast and so nicely that we BOTH kept looking at each other with the silent language techniques that we have mastered and kept saying huh??? Then we would smile and be like oh, ok God….. then continue talking with the saleswoman..  We prayed for the lady during the process and the other sales team brought us food and beverages and chit chatted and their was one that kept flirting. I said to my sister, I know JUST HOW to get him to leave us alone just until the deal gets done. I asked him would he buy me a cross over truck since I am such a nice lady and I am blessed by God. He laughed and advised me how pretty I was but said “maybe next time”…. I giggled because that was his language telling me>>>okay lady, I got the message and I hear you loud and clear!!! Nonetheless, the WHOLE car dealership had a great  spirit resting there that I had to find out information about the owner.

Come to find out that the original owner was a follower of Christ and the business has been open since 1953. I advised them that they are living off of the prayers of the patriach of the family owned business and that if they wanted to continue living in the overflow to not make any bad decisions to rip people off because it the end they will suffer. Shockingly, the sales people that I talked to agreed with what I shared…. me and my sister hugged as many as we could >>>and wanted to hug us back<<<< LOL !! Welp, I guess that we are just #teamblessed that is all!