Tag Archives: desire

A Mental Random –


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How a lot of people measure success is sometimes actually a bit scary –  Do not get me wrong – we all love nice things but nice things do not mold a decent human beings and if a person is not careful – their distorted view of success can deform the morals, values, stances, ethics and beliefs!

“Happiness” equals “success” and “success” equals “blessing.” Success (eudaimonia in Greek) is translated as happiness in English, and happy (makarios) is translated as blessed, or enjoying a share of the divine, living like a god. Animals cannot enjoy success, because they have no share of the divine, and the gods enjoy a different type of ideal existence.

In order to meet success you must use your skills and knowledge to pursue certain goals for the sake of higher goal. For example, a human can either: carry out one goal, such as running a mile, or carry out one objective for a higher purpose, such as being in shape. The single highest objective in life is to live well and fare well, i.e. being successful. An aim in the highest degree is only worth pursuing for itself and never anything else; success is worth pursuing in its own right.

However, you have to learn what success actually is – If your only focus is MONEY – HOUSES – CARS and – LAND …….then you are indeed headed for a heavy fall because those are only temporary THINGS….

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Observation –


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It is essential to know that to be a happy person, a happy family, a happy society, it is very crucial to have a good heart, that is very crucial. We all must find peace from within so that we can love one another effectively as God created us to do so. Peace is not just the absence of violence but the manifestation of human compassion.

So with that being said… it is VERY VITAL of the role FATHER in any given relationship with his child. Some have to be taught how to do and be things in life but also have the DESIRE to want to “do and do better” in all aspects. Do I feel that my son loves his father? Absolutely…. Do I feel that his father loves him? Absolutely…. Do I want things to be better between them? Absolutely….

I am praying earnestly that this is a beginning of something CONSISTENT AND AMAZING with the reconciliation of my son and his father coming together. ( for the 99th time ) This time around would make it a solid 100 and I have HIGH HOPES for this relationship to form and grow beautifully and it would become and REMAIN pleasing to The Lord.

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I do not want my son’s father “to take his turn” so to speak, I do not “want a break” so to speak BUT I just want his father just simply “to do his part”…. and remain CONSISTENT with love, compassion, understanding, availability etc..etc..etc.. and all that GOOD stuff that comes along with being a present parent. His father does has it in him – ……

I look at it like a descent guy who has really lost his way……. and maybe he just misplaced the ACTIVATION BUTTON!!! I am praying that little space where ever that button  is hidden becomes activated and stays ON! I have faith so I do believe it shall happen! When, I do not know….. but I do trust and believe that it will come and my son will indeed be glad about it!!!

Pray my strength in The Lord……. Pray my son’s strength in The Lord!

P.S. I am so serious about this topic!

When Normal Was Reality


I was going through a few photos that I found of family members and I almost SCREAMED out loud because when I viewed them it was super indeed bitter / sweet… Seriously it was / is…

Like God…. REALLY? Why and and How are the two main culprit questions that I am tired of dissecting! Keeping your family on common ground is simply EXHAUSTING! Trust me….

God knows that my family used to be SIMPLY AMAZING, really we all were!! I am praying that everyone REALLY soul searches and see the part (s) that they have played as well as STILL playing in regards to keeping the family split…. Life is too short for foolishness is it not?

Heavenly Father, Please shine your light upon my family, Give us strength to overcome all of the
difficulties that we are dealing with now and protect us against any and all problems
we may encounter in the future.  Oh Lord, please bring us together as we are meant to be. May the love that binds us only grow stronger as we fulfill the destiny you have laid out for us. Grant my family forgiveness for any sins we have committed.

May we also forgive one another Lord, as it is sometimes difficult to do… GEESH!!

Bless us Lord, In your name I pray, Amen

Raising Daughters


Uggghhhh!!! Can you feel the ugggggghhhhh in my voice and in my heart, I mean seriously!

The whole point of punishment and discipline is helping to keep our children safe and teaching them to be good human beings. But what if they keep pushing back? Is there a time when you have to just let them face the sometimes-ugly results of their actions?  Uggghhh! This can be difficult for a parent, who wants the best for their child, to accept.

My super silly 10 year old son gives me NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PROBLEMS whatsoever! Lord, help because they are like night and day.. I really wish that she had even HALF of his tendencies!

I mean my daughter who is 19 speaks the language of wanting to CHANGE but does not whole heartedly put forth the actions via the language of wanting to CHANGE! So what is a Christian Single Parent to do…….. Pray…Pray…Pray….. but in the meantime – between time and NOW –

I want to CHOKE as well as HUG my daughter daily…. I shared with her that we have a Culture Clash issue – the way that I live and condition my house is not ANYTHING of what she has been exposed to and used to since she has not been living with me and it can make a person COO – COO for COCOA PUFFS!

She has such a huge heart but my GOD!!!!!!!!!! So rugged and rough around the edges – I mean heck –  who would NOT want change if they have been living in a crazy state of being?

A family is not a democracy. I have REFUSED and will not be swayed by the “it’s a free world” and “I can do what I want” argument. God placed me to be her dictator, and for good reason. Democratic families crumble………..we are not on the same level – I just wish that she would really get that MUCH NEEDED epiphany – sooner than later….

uggghhhh…….. whew…I needed to vent and now I am 75% better……..

Is This What Jesus Feels Like?


I finally obtained a chance to see and talk to MY DAUGHTER!! I went to go and see her and she ran up to me like she was a 5-year-old child!! I went to see her earlier in the day and her co workers did not believe that I was her mother….they thought that I was her sister and a few others, just felt as if I was her friend! LOL

Anyway….seeing her and knowing that there “has FINALLY been a change” in her made my VERY SOUL shout out to the Lord Jesus Christ! I was and I am still so so grateful ………… my son at first was a tad bit leery because ALLLLLLLLL of the stuff he knows that she and her twin brother has put me through over the years!

I  had to tell him off to the side then AGAIN in front of his sister that we all have to forgive… and there will be many more times that we may not want to but we have to….especially when it is FAMILY. If you really look at my son’s face, his smile is very FORCED AND FAKE…. however by the time our meeting time was over…he felt so much more comfortable and was actually glad to see his big sister…. She saw as well as felt the difference but she too, understood why he was being a little distant….

I told my own mother that …is this what the Lord feels like every time one of his children ” COMES BACK HOME ” to Him! LOL I know that they talk about the prodigal son in the bible but my goodness, in this day and age – there are SEVERAL prodigal daughters as well!!! I mean like to have her hugging me….squeezing me to pieces…smiling uncontrollably….crying and saying over and over how much she misses me and needs me in her and she is sorry – ….. YEAH – that is some of the same stuff that we as Christians say to the Lord when we know that we have messed up and know that we cannot go on productively without Him!

Nonetheless, OF COURSE I had my arms open to her and expressed not only how much I loved her but how she needs to have Jesus in her life. I had to tell her that it was God that told me to make a detour and come and see her and I am glad that I obeyed. The Lord had indeed softened my heart again towards her and it was  ONLY God that could have done it.. She smiled and became teary eyed again and said that she knew it was God. We prayed….talked…laughed….re -connected and vowed to work on our relationship WITH GOD IN THE MIDDLE of it.

#grateful

 

FINALLY!


Over the last 2 weeks, I have been obtaining strategy to deal with my family – mainly my almost 19 year old twin children. I have written MANY blogs about them and 2 out of 50 have been positive and the 50 of course has been me expressing how much pain that I have been experiencing.  Well, the last 2 weeks have mentally, emotionally and spiritually AMAZING! I have finally LET GO in order for The Lord to FLOW in their lives! I did not think that I would be able to do it but I did and I am very glad about it. God knows that I love my two oldest BUT the way that they have treated me since they have stayed with their father has TRULY BEEN UNBEARABLE!  I am no perfect mother but I have strived for perfection in Christ Jesus!

I just FINALLY have peace and joy with how I will deal with my kids going forward because you have no idea how horrid it has been for me over the years. When God would instruct me to do things and I DID NOT WANT TO, I did anyway. Doing things GOD’S WAY is always a must for TRUE and LASTING success! My children have only desired to use me for what I was able to give them or what doors that I would be able to open for them-  God showed me last week that is the same concept that we as Christians do towards Him! Nonetheless, this time of silence and separation that HE has ordained for me I have SOOOOOOO EMBRACED!

To my fellow parents, especially single parents – KNOW THAT the seeds of Christ that you have implanted into your children shall not die within them and your labor has not been in vain! You have to NOW operate as a minister and NOT as an earthly parent because going back and forth being a minister then handling your kids as a parent confuses the very task of what you are trying to accomplish. For goodness sake, ALWAYS STAND YOUR GROUND via your Christian principles and what you will and will not allow in your life, your house, your atmosphere etc.

It may take a minute for you to obtain the epiphany but know that it will come so you can move forward in the things of God on your children’s behalf. What God has me operating is BEYOND the Tough Love Approach – this is SPIRITUAL WARFARE!

The beauty of it ” NOW ” is that I know that I am at the end of the war!!! The enemy has been winning all of these battles between me and my teenagers but I serve a God that reminds me and has shown me how I AM GOING TO WIN! Matter of fact, I have already won and I am just in the waiting period of the situation! To God be the Glory for the many things that He has done, is doing and will do!

It feels utterly amazing