Mothers and Sons


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As much as my kid works my nerves… I do love hanging out with him…. Just going out to hang out with friends is soo relaxing mentally.. It’s been just me and him for so long that as a single parent..I need space a few times a week.
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However, it is rightfully so (in my son’s mind of course) that if we aren’t together…he needs to know my very whereabouts! ! I used to tell him ALL 10 things…  BUT know I had to literally scale it back / down to like 4 things.. . .  I set up an atmosphere that he felt as if it was his RIGHT TO KNOW my every single whereabouts!!! Lol
WhileI’m out doing MY own thing and just breathing my own air without my kid trying calculate how much I breathed WITHOUT HIM…..
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When I pick him up to head home….I actually have the nerve to miss him as well…LOL – He indeed is a special kid…

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Learning To Bend –


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Okay, for a LONG time……I mean a VERY LONG TIME – I have had issues with tattoos….I didnt like them, well I STILL DONT care for them at all especially if they are on MY KIDS…..However, The Lord has helped me GET OVER this little hump that I HAVE MADE a big hump in reference to my son – his arms used to haunt me!!! No seriously!!
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Are you trying to figure out how long it took? Please don’t because YES it was very long…but here is the good thing about it – after all of these LONG YEARS – God gave me Revelation about them in regards to my 20-year-old son…. (my baby)

God told me to LET IT GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I shared this EPIPHANY 2 weeks ago with my son while we was out to dinner…..I advised him that The Lord told me that I need to FOCUS on other REAL LIFE STUFF in regards to my son and He will handle the rest…… my son LAUGHED …smiled then gave me a high-five and said – “MOMMY, I AGREE WITH THE LORD”…….. I even had to giggle myself.. because honey – it works and I am glad that I have listened to The LORD.
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I made some serious progress folks but listen – I was FURIOUS with God…because “at first” …………I was like HUH? Even look at how my mommy was looking at my son’s arms!! LOL
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Nonetheless, I am glad that I am LEARNING to pick MY BATTLES and stop stressing myself  out with the silly things…… well NOT silly things – but the things that should not necessarily take precedence in this season!
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Moral of the story – learn to get over the “small stuff”…………I finally did –

Quick Parenting Talks –


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My current situation on a Monday night….. I wish that I could just be laying and watching television but im not! My son and I are re – capping the conversation that we had earlier today on our way home about how he wish things were different.

As a single parent………. I have always seemed to have to endure heart wrenching talks with my 11 year old wonderful son in regards to his relationship with his father –  uuuggghh … I tell you – it makes me sad and angry all at the same time! HOWEVER, God has granted me the ability and choice to pray and wait on Him to move in this area.

My son went down for prayer yesterday at church in regards to his father and the inconsistency that is VERY MUCH alive within their relationship. It was good for my son to go down on his own because it allowed us both to hold onto hope yet again! Regardless of what his father not being there on a consistent basis, it is BOTH of our desires that God would show him what he indeed is missing –
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Children NEED both their Fathers and their Mothers because they have something to INSTILL into their children. God has a plan for my son and I am STILL holding onto to the things that I know to be true. It is a weekly prayer that we have to do in regards to making sure that my son DOES NOT BECOME BITTER.

The dynamic is VERY INTERESTING because he can talk with his father one day after months going by and my son will be like mushy puddy because OF COURSE he just misses his father – however, as soon as he hangs up the phone – he comes in pours his heart onto my shirt, lap and shoulder with tears-
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As his mother – I keep my PERSONAL FEELINGS to myself and just talk, pray and hug on him always reminding him how AWESOME of a son he indeed is. I also remind my son that we STILL have to pray for his father in spite of….
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Prayer is one thing but God knows that actions are just as important to the lives of children in regards to their parents.

Whew – he is better now – this is a ROUTINE that I cannot wait to be stopped / FIXED in Jesus name –

Honey, it is SPIRITUALLY, MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY exhausting for me and my son but God is the PERFECT Healer in any and all situations that may seem where there is NO HOPE – Thank God for His goodness and His mercy during this time!

Letting Go Daily –


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I am learning that as my son is getting OLDER …… I have to let him go day by day via treating him like he will NEVER leave the house!  Only a few more years left and I will be saying >>> SEE YA LATER BUDDY BOY!! ( hiding my tears )

The toughest thing about being a parent (or a teacher) is learning when NOT to be one. You don’t have to take my word for it, just ask Marlon. (The mivie Finding Nemo ) His wife was brutally attacked and killed by a man-eating barracuda, thrusting him into the role of a “single dad.” Now we know that in AMERICA there are more single mothers than single fathers. Not discounting single dads at all but ……….. ( LOL )

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Although only an animation film, “Finding Nemo” portrays the real life struggles many parents face in “letting go of their children.” I have to say that I have been doing great though….. He has been finding new things to do with his life and his SELF lately…just look at this CRAZY hair cut that HE WANTED!! Inside I was screaming like, baby this isn’t you, is it?

As in real life, most parents (and children) don’t see the potential dangers of a parent being overprotective. And it’s easy to understand why many parents would respond the way Marlon did. Growing up in an inner city ghetto myself, there were many barracudas waiting to devour me.

Like most children, Nemo became very upset with his “loving” father’s obsession with protecting him from unforeseen danger. During one heated exchanged, Nemo uttered the phrase that strikes fear in the heart of every parent, “I hate you.” As a result of his father’s controlling behavior, Nemo intentionally rebels against his father and is consequently “fish-napped” by a diver.
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I am letting my son go DAILY…… Keep him grounded in Godly principles and heavily involved and push him even at times when I know that pushing him / teaching him to do MORE will allow him to depend on me LESS. That is a good thing but the love of a mother is something ferocious!  My son calls me MOMMA BEAR because when someone bothers him – a whole NEW PERSON “comes over me”….. LOL I get into a mode that I will crush anything in my when it comes to protecting my son…. ( in a diplomatic and lady like way of course – lol )
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I am proud of myself…for “choosing” to start MY PROCESS of letting go daily while he is young. As a parent, you cannot start trying to cope that your child is going to be moving out of the house when they are GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL! You do know that is WAY too late right? LOL

Two Is A Crowd – LOL


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This is for all the SINGLE MOM’s out there who have kids and especially young boys who adore them…… Take more time away from them!! LOL My son feels that if he is not away at some type of camp, or baseball practice, basketball practice, band practice, martial arts practice, soccer practice or at school….. That he is indeed supposed to be with me!!!!!!
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Talk about 2 is crowd lately …forget the number 3… When I pick him up from different places and he sees that I have bags OF ANY SORTS or my phone rings and ” HE DOES NOT RECOGNIZE” the person’s voice, name or face on my smart phone – he feels some kind of way!!
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Mom’s I tell you…….lately TWO IS A CROWD in my book!! Geesh… This boy! Yes, we are disgusting close BUT at the same time – he knows that I am not and have NOT raised any ” Momma’s Boys” either.  It is a shame that a mom would RUIN her son like that because it would make him NO GOOD to women as he gets older….. Something about mothers and sons….. I tell ya! Yikes!!
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Had to vent because over the last week – my son has been SUFFOCATING me! LOL – It is like he misses me and does not want to tell me – he went away for camp again and was gone for a week but the camp is only like an hour and a half away – and he is just…… UGGGHHH!!!..  Like I said – two is a crowd! LOL

Another Letter – “for him”


Wow, we have made it 11 years TOGETHER and we still are “besties”…..LOL

Thank you so much for teaching me how to become a better PERSON first…. There has been SEVERAL times / moments that had me displaying anger due to a multiplicity of things that either HAPPENED or DID NOT HAPPENED and through it all – you have always been my “soft voice” to calm my nerves!

May 31, 2013 is a day that I am grateful to see with you……

Although you turn 11 years old today but God know that spiritually you are at least 16 years of age and naturally just doing everyday normal adult like things – you are EASILY at least 18 years old – *go get your driver’s license* ( LOL) 

I would like to apologize to you for the days that I may have FUSSED at you more than you may have wanted to deal with – I forget sometimes that although you are VERY MATURE for your age…..at the end of the day –

You are “STILL” a little boy …who is growing up into a mature “tween” and I have to allow you to do that REGARDLESS how many times you say and do things that seem / are adult like. Thank you for allowing me to MOTHER you and choosing to love me back!

DISCLAIMER: –

It is NO SECRET that you have almost “everything” but I still pray that this weekend, “starting today”  – you will realize how blessed you really are and not to take even the things that you may feel is “little” or “ordinary” or “what you feel is a standard way of life” for granted.

REALIZE  the daily gems /  the lifestyle that I provide for you is NOT normal for the average kid……. You are beyond blessed – remember that!

Love you 2 Life…….

 “Momma Pooh”

Encouraging Myself –


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The difficult teen will do things their own way, in their own time, regardless  of your wishes or schedule.
The good teen will do what you ask, when you ask,  even though they may complain a little.
It’s easy to love a good  child.

The difficult teen will try your patience and understanding every  day.  They will challenge the depths of your love, the core of your soul  numerous times throughout each day, until you wonder if you have any strength  left.  The good teen will try your patience and understanding from time to  time. They will challenge your ability to see just how many extracurricular  activities you can cram into each day, until you wonder if you have any energy  left.
It’s easy to love a good child.

The difficult teen will sneak  out of the house at night to buy drugs, only to have the police knock at your  door at 3am on a work night so you can come down to the station to pick them up.  They’ve been arrested.
The good teen will sneak out of the house at night (on  a weekend) to TP the soccer coach’s house after a big win, only to go back to  the coaches house the next morning.  To help clean up.
It’s easy to love a  good child.

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The difficult teen will skip school, even when you drop them  off out front and watch them walk inside.  No matter how hard a parent tries to  help or force a child, the difficult teen may not graduate from High School.   The difficult teen won’t be going off to college.  The good teen might  consider skipping a class or two, but doesn’t want to get caught. A parent  doesn’t have to make an effort to keep a good kid in school. The good teen  ponders which college they should attend.
It’s easy to love a good  child.

The difficult teen is often withdrawn from family.  They don’t  smile a lot, they don’t get real enthusiastic about much. A parent’s heart breaks  a little more every day.  The good teen is often tells family about things  that happened during their day.  They smile and laugh a lot, and are enthusiastic  about a lot of things. A parent’s heart soars a little more every day.
It’s  easy to love a good child.

So many people give up on the difficult teen.   Write them off as being unworthy of their efforts.  Distrust, because they don’t  understand.  Give up because it’s the easiest thing to do.  So many people  cheer for the good teen.  Try to help them in any way they can. Trust them,  because it’s not hard to do so.  Encourage them to succeed because they seem to  want to.
It’s easy to love a good child.

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It’s easy to love the good  teen.  The parent’s of them, thank God their life is going as planned.  That  they have good children to love. Sure, a parent loves their good teen  unconditionally. But they haven’t really had to put that to the test.  They  haven’t had to test the limits of their understanding and forgiveness.  Their  souls and faith are intact because they haven’t been shattered. Do they realize  that the most important things in life are the little things? The path of the  good teen may not be exactly what a parent would have chosen, but they know that  everything will turn out all right.
It’s not easy to love the difficult teen.  But I thank God for  them, for without the difficult teens, how can we possibly understand what  unconditional love really is?  How would we know just how deeply we can love,  and how easily we can forgive?  How would we otherwise test the endurance of our  souls, the depths of our faith?  How else would we realize just how strong we  really are?  How else would we know what is TRULY important in life.

The path  of the difficult teen may not be what a parent would have chosen, but it is the  hand that they were dealt.